Dialectical Thinking: Embrace Opposing Thoughts
Written by Mars Meraz, Graduate Student Intern
Our bodies biologically exist to be most efficient for survival. Our brains create schema- or mental frameworks based on our lived experience- to most efficiently process new things and fuel our thoughts and actions. If you’ve been fired in the past over a small mistake, your brain may create anxiety around every mistake at your next job. If you’ve been cheated on while a partner was distant, your brain may overanalyze your next partner’s presence in your relationship. Schemas are helpful when we need to survive, like when our brain shortcuts to avoid a dish that's fresh from the oven, but life is not always as simple as that.
Black and White Thinking is Rarely Helpful
The truth is that oftentimes there is a bigger picture to a story that our pattern of thinking may not consider. It is easy to interpret things as either entirely good or entirely bad, but it is not how the world works. Where there is good, there is often bad, and vice versa. When our brain shortcuts to a line of thinking for means of survival this can often create unnecessary anxiety and catastrophize a situation. A solution for challenging your brain is to practice dialectical thinking.
What is Dialectical Thinking?
Dialectical thinking is seeing things from multiple perspectives, and recognizing that there is often opposing thoughts and contradictory information within those perspectives. It is the idea that multiple truths can exist even if they oppose each other, because opposites exist everywhere. When we take into consideration that everything is made up of opposites, we can stop catastrophizing thoughts in their tracks.
How To Begin Dialectical Thinking
A simple way to baby-step into dialectical thinking is to replace the “but” in your thoughts to “and”.
“My boss is disappointed with my recent work, and they also value my contributions to the team and believe in my work ethic.”
“My partner is distant, that hurts me, and also has never acted with malice towards me.” This can also apply to personal growth and self forgiveness.
“I am ready to change and afraid to change.”
“I am completely happy with where I’m at and striving to improve”.
Another way to practice dialectical thinking is to modify all-or-nothing lines of thought. Change “I hate them” to “I hate what they did to me”; change “my life is a mess” to “my life is a mess right now”.
Finally, don’t be afraid to observe dialectics in the world around you. Purposeful observation and thought opens our eyes to the truth that opposites are everywhere, and the more you practice looking for them, the easier you’ll be able to find them within your own life.
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